Posts Tagged birthdays

Sunday Column (476)

We are getting closer to 500 Sunday Columns. That’s close to 520 weeks, which is close to….10 years Sunday Column blog posts. I love writing weekly, actually I journal daily and focus on what I like the best. I like to focus my energy on positive things and things I enjoy. As of my latest podcast, a healthy mind in a healthy body, positivity is key! See more below.

I have been asked in interviews what I have been doing since I left my last employer. Theoretically I just finished gardening leave. And I have discussed that with people too: looking for a job is a full time job. But me being me, I cannot just do that. I record podcasts, met coaches online, networking, speaking to people, advice companies and consult. I just said to my wife the other night, I am so super busy, what am I going to do when I actually get a full time job 🙂 And just on Friday I got another consulting work through, so yes, I am NOT sitting on the couch waiting for recruiters to call. I could wait a long time for that it seems at times.

When launching this week’s podcast, Pascal Finette, the downloads sky rocketed. An amazing guest and I want to have him back on my podcast. He is such an inspirational interview partner. As Pascal said, we are needing to focus on the bright spots in the world and the ones that drive us forward, not the black spots associated with failure. I am trying my hardest. I am entertaining, that’s how it seems, some opportunities for work, which I know will not result in bright spots, yet they keep up morale. And every opportunity is learning. For some I am too sales lead, for others I am too operational. You cannot win, no matter how much you explain what you have done, it comes down to personal connection and chemistry. I am doing well though, and I am sure things will work out in the end. They always will. It is an up and down, and I want to be honest, the market only picked up mid January, so all I am really looking at is 4 weeks of job hunt. I am doing well for that. Keep your fingers crossed. As above, it’s not that I am not busy.

This week, I heard a sad story from a friend of mine, which puts a job search into perspective. It puts life into perspective and sometimes makes your think why we doing what we are doing. Life ain’t fair, and sometimes it is hard to believe that things will happen for a reason. But they do and the dots will connect moving forward. Trust in the greater universe. But they might just not connect in the way you expect them to. Funny isn’t that? Actually on Saturday morning I had a thought whilst meditating that put life into perspective once again. About energy fields and love – that’s really what connects us humans, and some are better at that than others. I need to give it more thoughts but honestly, Jung’s theory around the collective unconsciousness makes a lot of sense to me. Maybe my next book will be more philosophical. What is life all about? Who determines ‘success in life’? I love that research and part of it is of course my podcast.

Whilst naturally my job hunt dominates my life, there is more to it. My boys and time spend with them. This weekend was my 7th year old’s birthday. Mighty proud he was, and should be. He is super sweet and I couldn’t cuddle him enough, the innocence and heart warming stories he tells me and the things we make up as we go along. Teaching him about life and watching him just now, this moment of writing, warming up in Karate. He has his whole life ahead of him, curious and driven to learn. It is the best thing in the world, no matter how tiring and annoying kids can be at times 😉

I remember as if it was yesterday that I was speaking to the nurse who delivered him. And whilst my wife was about to go into the delivery room, I was still on the phone with my former boss about priorities of hiring a Sales Director. Full on and committed in a start up. Only 7 years ago. I have done a fair share of ‘sleeping under the desk’ within a start up and sacrificing my family life for the sake of companies. And, I would do it again. Yet as I get older I wonder if it is too much to ask to just have a ‘normal job’, which I appreciate doesn’t really exist. What is normal these days. But I am drifting into work stories again. Also, I am not that old yet, and there is still a LOT of fire burning in my belly. One is for a job opportunity I am waiting to hear, which would allow me to do something I have done in the past, but this time I could apply a lot more learning and it would accelerate things. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves, there are other interesting opportunities I found out this week too. Sitting tight was the advice from a good friend and mentor this week.

It is funny how work is always a major part of ones life until work becomes something pleasurable to do and you hardly notice it. Not sure this make sense. And yet I wouldn’t do anything different if I had to start again. Or would I? My first podcast host mentioned that when you leave university, you should try to work for a big name in the industry. Funny that my first two jobs were with big names and I didn’t even plan it. It didn’t help so far. However, the dots will connect looking backwards. They will. I cannot wait to discover it all.

Anyway, a clip-and-climb afternoon at the local leisure centre followed by a night at the Indian. For someone who isn’t too keen on food, he loved the experience. But experience is all what it is about and that really means, and that means being around and spend time with your first priority. And that is always your family, the work life balance, the life balance, needs to be set right. I can do that. Never ever did I have so much time to focus on my most important things in life. I feel blessed, almost too blessed sometimes. I will look back in years to come to realise which opportunity I had. I might have missed some of it too. But I won’t know until I start looking back. Hindsight in life, isn’t it?

As of my meditation above, I thought of my grandparents this week. Partly because it was my dad’s birthday too, but also because Rohan asked me how my granddad died. And that’s when I remember sitting with my grandma, the summer of 2002, I just had lived a year in the UK, when I came back to my granddad’s funeral and an internship for the summer. I remember the emotions and love and discussions we had, sitting in the shade on their balcony. When you feel that deep connection with someone, this inner bond, the energy flow – that special feeling, then try to hold on to it. Be there in the moment and let go of everything else. It is called love. Don’t ignore it. There is nothing wrong with having bonds with people through positive energy.

Have a fantastic week,
Volker

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Sunday Column (442)

I love flying out on a Tuesday. The planes are emptier, the airport is busy with tourists, yet things seem to go smoother than Mondays. Soon I have to fly both ways from Heathrow again, Easyjet stops flying out early from Gatwick. However, as I am going less often, this will be manageable. I didn’t miss not flying last week, and the boys truly enjoyed having me around. On Friday I had a half day, which was to look after the boys. We had an amazing weekend: bowling, pizza, going on the bikes and just having loads of fun.

The weekend was topped by my oldest son’s birthday on Monday. I managed to work from home. So not only could I complete another run but also be there for the 7 am, with him being awake from 5, unwrapping his presents. A new pod or Walkman was the main present, another cosy blanket, and a fidget cube. His actually birthday party was this weekend with a trip to Laserworld. Whilst I cannot believe that he is 8 already, I sometimes wonder how time flies.

Also, we went to the youngest school fair. I remember going to that fair a year before we moved to Hassocks. It is a village get together, a catch up amongst dads, mums and kids of course. A great way to spend a sunny summers day. Great to see you all.

When I was 8, I am sure, I cycled around town on the roads. Maybe I didn’t. My oldest isn’t, and I am still protective of him going up the hill and cycling down in our quiet cul de sac. Maybe our generation is too overprotective. Maybe we fear the worst. Last weekend, we took the bars on the side of his bed off. He still wiggles a lot but claims he slept in beds at friends without bars and didn’t fall out. What if he did? He won’t die falling out of bed. But we fear for their safety and security.

No, I am not knocking fear. Just the opposite, fear is healthy. The reason I write about it, is that Tim Ferris in his latest TED talk is speaking about conquering fear. One of his guests stated that if you make easy decisions you have a hard life but if you make hard decisions, you have an easy life. We must make decisions and approach and conquer fear. One must ask the question what the worst possible outcome would be, and if that’s happening, what would you do instead? How could you escape the worst possible situation if what you fear actually happens?

A coping mechanism. And that’s what in my opinions systems are all about. In my book I write about best practises to work on your own systems and define your own habits, routines: systems. Due to lack of time I havnen’t really started to formalise a more condensed approach, e.g. a seminar or one pager or video. This is still all to come and my next project on the horizon. Life doesn’t have to be difficult. Even with doing two jobs, I don’t feel that I am overworked. Sometimes there is too much to do, but on most days I manage fine. Delegation, systems, decisions and focus are key. However, when I worked from home the other day, I was sitting in the living room around 7.30 pm and thought I should carry on. I don’t normally have that much time, but I did miss the 3 hours commute that day, on which I normally finalise a few projects. Systems absolutely help to get on top of things, stay on top of tasks and manage team members well. Yet, more often than not, I am still the one doing more than others, just because I very much enjoying it. Life couldn’t be better at the moment I find, and it seems as if I am settling in just fine.

Just as I think life might be a routine itself, and it never is, there are new challenges ahead, and new decisions to face. Being surrounded by great teams and support staff, I think we can turn up the heat one more bit. I want more out of life, enjoy it more by achieving and experiencing more. Life becomes almost like a drug where achievements sporns me on. Where I feel like I would like to achieve more. This isn’t even about money, ownership and possessions but about owning experience and learning, knowledge and a better system to cope with more. This is particularly true in times like these where we don’t know what the Brexit strategy is or how our government will look like in six months time. Uncertainty is part of our life, in politics and elsewhere, yet Systems stabilise those and make it bearable and conquerable.

One decision I can speak about soon. I want to discuss it with some friends and noodle on it. It is a sporting challenge, but as one says, if you are thinking of already doing something, haven’t you made your decision already? This goes in line with some news I heard this week and some connections I made this week also. Positives and Negatives. Life is yin and yang. And we should honour what we have, and enjoy whilst we can. The terrible fire in London this week reminded us yet again that we never know what’s around the corner.

I guess I talked enough about systems and fear today. In other news I had a quite enjoyable trip to Germany this week. Short and sweet or Kurz und Knackig (short and cross/crisp (?)) as the Germans would say. It is funny how some things cannot really be translated. I came across a quote last week ‘ein Affe auf dem Schleifstein’ which just doesn’t translate. A description of a monkey bending over a far too small tool/table. The look you get if you put your 8 year old on a bike of a 3 year old. Never mind.

Have an amazing week,
Volker

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